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I know, maintaining relationships takes a lot of effort, be it friendship or something more deeper. For a person like me with a job that requires me to be away for a few weeks to months can be quiet tiresome. There were moments in the past were I get less and less communications and creates situations that we wished it wont happen again.
For anyone here who have experience, is there any tricks and advice that you can share?
I agree with you girl, long distance can be harder than conventional relationship. Entering that type of relationship, you have to be wise and strong. You should learn to trust and bring a lot of patience with you. But even if it sounds harder, that should not hinder you from the happiness of creating a beautiful relationship. Specially with our internet communications where you get to see at talk at the same time with someone you love. You just have to be positive.
I've done a long distance sort of relationship in the past when my ex was temporarily assigned overseas for 6 months.
Here' s what I did:
1. Communicate a lot. I started my morning calling and texting. We actually adjust our schedule since our time zone are 5 hours apart. so expect that your partner might be still sleeping when you wake up or you are sleeping when he finally out of his office at 6 pm his time
2. Schedule a date nights. well, your night can be his afternoon but it does not matter. You both are free perhaps on weekends. On date nights, you can talk non stop, watch the same film together or have meals at the same time.
3. I cook his favorite meal.
4. We pray together and read book to each other over the phone.
5. We remind and keep track of each other's fitness routine.
6. We renew the trust by talking about daily events.
7. Build up more trust by being transparent.
8. Surprise each other by sending gifts.
9. Never stop loving.
10. Don't ever give up.
Some times it work, some times it does not work.
Long distance is workable for certain couples who are really into each other. But it is not for everyone.
Trust is a must.
It can make or break a relationship. But if you happen to make it through the trials, it can really make a relationship stronger.
But both must work it out and have a plan.
It should have a direction.
Separation should be temporary and be able to determine the time length.
I have never been in a long distance relationship before. But as for me, as long as you both are trying hard to keep your relationship, then I guess distance doesn't really matter at all. Anyway, I would say, no matter how busy you are, always find time to talk to your partner. Communication is one of the essential factors in a relationship, whether it may be about friendship or love.
I had a long distance relationship with my husband before we got married. What I had learned from this kind of relationship is that the big trust we had for each other, the constant communication, the time spent and always keeping in touch with each other are the reasons why our relationship is that strong and really works out for the longest period of time. And above to all of this things is we always put God in the center of our relationship that is why our faith is the one that is binding us together into our relationship.
For me, long distance relationships are hard to maintain as it requires a lot of effort. I don't really like that kind of relationship, that's why quite a few men decided to stop being with me. Anyways, I read in Cosmopolitan, that for a LDR to work, you must trust each other. Because trust is the foundation of any relationship. Given that you must prioritize trusting your partner over doubts and fears. If you give in to your doubts and fears, jealousy would come next, then things will fall apart. You do not want that, so keep trusting him and encourage him to do the same as well.
This is the exact thing that I'm going through right now so I can completely empathize with you, Aida. My boyfriend of two years with whom I was living for nearly a year, recently moved out to another city for a new job.This decision was agreed upon by both of us so I can't blame him for taking the job. It's a struggle every single day to function with thought of losing him constantly nagging at the back of my mind. But like some have said, communication and effort are the two things that can help you tide over this situation.
What the two of us make it a point to do is text each other whenever we can or feel like, irrespective of whether the other person is available on the other end or not. Some times if I wake up in the middle of the night and start missing him horribly, I just text him and tell him exactly how I feel and how I wish he were there. Sometimes I wake up to find similar texts waiting for me in my inbox. These are the moments we both live for while being away from each other. Apart from this, we talk on Skype whenever possible. Some nights we just keep the video chat on and watch each other sleep off and wake up in the morning to find our faces frozen in really funny positions! We also send each other pictures from our daily lives - food I cooked, or a book I'm reading, or something that I bought, or even a pimple that may have grown on my nose! I make it a point to tell him most of the things that I did in the day, ask him for his opinions about things that I'm doing, just to make him feel involved in my life despite the distance. He does the same.
It's only been a little over a week for me into this form of long distance relationship. I'm as worried about us as any body would be. But the above mentioned things are just some of the little ways in which we try to stay connected and close, despite the distance, till we meet again.
Just get to know each other and make sure you do cam. Long distance is hard but if you are really compatible you can make it work and meet eventually.
When my boyfriend went abroad on a job assignment, we knew it would be difficult for us to maintain our relationship because distance is not a joke. There was no internet yet, no cellphone either, and overseas call was very expensive. The cheapest communication was postal mail. We were writing each other at least 2 times a week. To avoid confusion, our letters were numbered since it takes 2 weeks for the turnaround. So I am sending letter #10 while reading letter #7 from him. Those letter exchanges helped a lot because we were able to surmount the odds. And when he came back home, we were just like before with our relationship.
So my advice is the constant communication and, of course, understanding.
As they said "Distance makes the heart grow fonder". That is why a long distance relationship can really work if both partners are willing to sacrifice and to accept to whatever differences they had in their life while they are far away from each other.
I think it really depends on the two people in that relationship.
I mean long-distance is hard, but if you are really really in love with the other, you can make it through. Working together and consciously keeping the flame alive is one thing, but trusting the other one and not letting jealousy take over is almost as important.
Although distance truly does make the heart grow fonder, it can also play a huge role in being unsuccessful. I fell in love with someone that lived 4,000 miles away from me. Not only was it one of the best relationships I've had, but it was also one of the hardest relationships I've encountered. So much time was spent trying to make sure that the other person felt secure. It was a constant battle when it came to time zones and making sure we trusted each other enough to let each other have the friend time we needed. I would never be in a long distance relationship again, but I do understand the appeal. It can be so rewarding when you get to see your significant other after so much time, but it's also a terrible feeling when you have to leave. I remember feeling like my heart was being ripped to shreds every time I boarded my plane home.
It can get pretty insecure and uncertain at some points when the communication is poor in long distance relationships.
However, with technology so advanced there is a slim chance for excuses unless the partner is truly busy.
I feel honesty is the best policy in the long distance relationship. If there is true love, it may survive any duration provided there is willingness to be together.
I don't believe in long distance relationship.However, it has worked for some people I know personally. My brother was in a long distance relationship for 5 years and he married the girl, who he met on facebook for the first time, last April. I cannot imagine how could they be together after living in two cities during their five years relationship. Off course they met, but it was very often, just about one of two times in a year. Some people are really serious on long distance relationship
I don't think that there's any doubt that a long distance relationship DOES carry with it more problems than dating somebody local, but a lot depends on the two people that are involved and if they are willing to make it work or not. Trust is important in any relationship, and when it comes to dating somebody long distance, then I think that it's even more important than ever. There's no point in entering into a long distance relationship and treating it as any other, as there is going to be times when the relationship gets tested and you are going to have to know how to deal with it.
Communicating via messenger or Skype for example does put a strain on things, and especially if things aren't going well. Talking things over and sorting issues out that may come up is a lot easier face to face, and while I'm not saying that long distance relationships don't work, before people get into one, then I do think that we need to realise just what extra problems we may face, and maybe more importantly, have the right mentality to be able to deal with them.
You are quite right there @pwarbi, long distance relationships are way harder to be successful. For one, there's no intimacy between the couple. Secondly, they don't see each other on a daily basis and they see other people, so it's easy to get engaged with someone else.
I know life is complex, but if there is real love I think people should find a way to be together as a long distance relationship is the death of the relation in my opinion.
Mоst lоng-distаnсе rеlаtiоnships dоn't wоrk. Thеrе аrе rаrе еxсеptiоns whеrе а соuplе hаvе bееn tоgеthеr аnd оnе gоеs аwаy fоr еxаmplе, fоr wоrk аnd thеy саn't sее еасh оthеr physiсаlly еxсеpt mаybе viа Skypе.
But lоng distаnсе rеlаtiоnships miss оut оn whаt shоrt distаnсе rеlаtiоnships hаvе. Physiсаl соntасt is rеаlly impоrtаnt. аs wеll аs mutuаl еxpеriеnсеs. Thе mоrе еxpеriеnсеs thаt аrе missеd lеаd tо lеss аttrасtiоn bесаusе thеy аrеn't shаrеd with sоmеоnе yоu саrе аbоut...
Whеn it соmеs tо yоuth, аll thеy hаvе аrе things in соmmоn.
Hеrе's thе bеst I саn оffеr аbоut hоw wе mаdе it wоrk. (Yоur milеаgе mаy vаry.)
Trust еасh оthеr, аnd bе wоrthy оf оnе аnоthеr's trust. I'm аdding this tо thе tоp оf thе list bесаusе it's by аnd fаr thе mоst impоrtаnt thing. But I'm аlsо аdding it lаst, bесаusе it's nоt sоmеthing wе think аbоut оr tаlk аbоut vеry muсh. Wе just dо. I think it's sесоnd nаturе tо us, bеfоrе wе еvеn bеgаn. I dоn't fееl wе hаvе аny sесrеts bеtwееn us.
Lоts оf Skypе-оr-еquivаlеnt. Gеt wеbсаms; еxtrа pоints if thеy'rе оn а pоrtаblе dеviсе. Tаlk rеgulаrly, еvеn if it's nоt fоr vеry lоng. I оftеn еаt brеаkfаst in frоnt оf thе соmputеr (I knоw, I knоw) sо I саn сhаt а littlе in thе mоrning bеfоrе I hеаd оut. I аm nоt gоing tо miss virtuаl kissеs аnd timе zоnе tаg, but I'm glаd wе hаd this tесhnоlоgy. (Hе mаy bе in Swеdеn, but hе'd prоbаbly nоtiсе my unаnnоunсеd аbsеnсе lоng bеfоrе my pаrеnts асrоss tоwn.)