Is it okay to ask if he/she is still a virgin?

[missbookworm]

I have posted on this forum already about me dating a guy from high school. We've been going out for almost 8 months now. He's already been into relationships before, but I am still wondering if he's still a virgin or not. It actually matters to me since I am still a virgin as I never had a serious relationship before. My question is if it's alright to ask him such a thing?

[Corzhens]

Asking a guy if he is a virgin is okay because I don't think it matters much. But vice versa, it is kind of rude to ask a girl if she is a virgin. I wonder why it took you 8 months of dating and you seem not to know about him. You should have gone to intimate details like his style in relationships - visiting you at home, what he has to offer, etc. If you had gone through to those details then you would not be ashamed to ask him about virginity. But for me, virginity of the man doesn't matter. Whether he had sex with several women as long as he loves me and I would be the only one for him then the issue is more than settled.

[MrsS]

I think so because guys do not really mind. Or if you feel uncomfortable to ask then just ask indirectly. Perhaps you can ask about intimacy issues. It really depends on how open your relationship is by this time. I mean, in a boy-girl relationship, that topic is discussed sooner or later. It is also good if your partner is open to you about such things. It helps you get to know him or her better. It also gauges your level of understanding and acceptance of his past. I just hope that once you learn about it, it will not elicit doubt and jealousy from you since that's part of his past now. It is behind him now. What's important is the here and now and that is you at present.

[ReadmeByAmy]

There are some men as well there are some women who had different perspective when it comes to virginity issues. And each of them had different point of views whether virginity is important or not. Most of them this kind of thing does not matter and the respect, sincerity and love is the one that is important. You had been dating this guy for almost 8 months now and I am sure you knew him in some ways and you knew within yourself whether you will ask him this thing to him or not.

[Hugh]

I don't know about asking but at some point it would be good if it was shared.

[Bisler]

I think it is great that you have been dating for 8 months and you are still a virgin!

It means both of you are really taking the time to get to know each other. Once a physical relationship starts, it may overshadow you just being with each other, so I think it is extremely helpful when at this future point you really know each other well and have definitely found that you like each other just beyond the level of physical attraction.

While being a virgin is for most woman something they are rightfully proud of, it can be the opposite for a man.

Therefore I would not approach this topic carelessly with your bf.

But surely you have seen signs of how experienced your man is. Is he a good kisser, or ishe more awkward and needs to be taught or coached a little bit. Now. while this may not indicate if he actually is a virgin or not, you will get some idea about his level of experience in this field.

In any case, I think it is great that you are not hurrying things along and let your relationship unfold in a natural way. Good luck to you both!

[naffi93]

If not asking directly but it can be good to know before you get closer.
It is of course not mandatory, but can help a lot with getting comfortable with each other.

[nonomous]

I don't think that this is the first thing that you should ask someone, but it is definitely a valid question for the future. I would like to know if my partner is a virgin or not. I would want to know if I need to take special care for a first time encounter or not. It's also good to know your partners history. It can be a helpful thing to know, so that you can avoid any awkward experiences together and really understand each other. I really don't see anything wrong with asking this, but I'd wait until you are going in that direction.